{waiting for Jane} : fun friday

I am having a coffee date with a friend.  We are just chatting and suddenly I look past her and stop talking.  She sees my hesitation and I mumble, "turn around slowly."  She does and together we witness a rather large man taking a long, black, wavy wig out of a plastic Pick 'N Save bag.  My brow furrows in thought as I try not to stare.  He shakes out the wig, combing it quickly with his fingers before putting it on his head.  He puts on a pair of large sunglasses.

He looks a bit like Howard Stern.

At this point, most of the upper balcony where we are sitting is staring.  We all know staring is rude, but in this situation everyone was doing it and the majority rules.  The man (let's name him Howard after his twin) sits down and frequently peers over the balcony.  I try not to laugh and then I try to make sense of this scene.  Is he FBI or CIA?  No, too conspicuous.  Could he be a man waiting for another man but he wants to look like a woman?  No, that's weird.  I cannot figure it out.  Why would Howard sit at a table alone with a flowy head of fake hair when he's clearly looking for someone?

Soon he wanders around the main floor and now it's everyone else's turn to peer over the balcony.  Howard goes up to a group of young girls and tells them that he is indeed the talk show host mentioned above and now he seems a little creepy.  My friend and I decide to leave, but first we'll use the restroom.  We take turns keeping watch outside the door to see what Howard will do next.  He's weaving among tables back and forth and the baristas are all whispering about him.  I don't see any fingers pointed, but every head in the shop is attuned to Howard's next move.

A professional looking woman enters the coffee shop.  She looks like she has a good job by her sharp haircut and clothes.  She's petite and hiding next to the sale table as she looks for someone.  Howard sees her and approaches.  She shrinks a little when he stops to talk to her: "Are you Jane?"
She nods.
"I'm your match!" Howard exclaims.  He whips off the wig and sunglasses: "From Match.com!"
Jane tries to smile.
Howard laughs a little self-consciously.  "That didn't work for you, did it?"
Jane shakes her head, mouth agape.

And off they went to a flabbergasted and vastly entertained audience.

I have a feeling it was a one time date.